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Dating, Life,

How to Make Love Last

Through thick and thin.

I always thought this was a great analogy to describe the type of love you feel towards a partner or spouse and what you are willing to do for that person. Love is wholeheartedly giving yourself to someone with the hope that they will do the same.

If you think about why relationships do not work out, they ultimately boil down to four principles: trust, respect, loyalty and freedom. At the core of any happy relationship, these principles are the cornerstones.

Trust
Trust is by no means easy to build, but fundamental to the security and health of any relationship. Think about how many times you have worried about: who your significant other was hangout out with, what he or she was doing or if they were honest about where they were. These sort of thoughts can erode your spirits and question your feelings towards the relationship.

It is not easy to trust someone and should not be given blindly. When your partner has shown that they respect you and can be loyal, you can give trust in return, the love will build on itself.

Respect
I’ve found that the best way to avoid misunderstandings in a relationship is to be respectful towards your partner’s thoughts, feelings and needs. (To clarify, by misunderstandings, I mean fights, resentment and anger towards your partner). If you can make an effort to understand why your partner feels hurt, you will grow closer together.

Communication is key, be open about how you feel and willing to listen.

Loyalty
Loyalty is about us, not you or me. Hold your partner in as high of light (or higher) as yourself. A strong couple is like a team; they work together and are considerate of the other person’s feeling. Understand that your actions affect everyone in the group.

Freedom
Love is about letting the other person be free. While you are loyal to one another, you are also individuals with your personal needs and goals. Be respectful of the time your partner may need to themselves and be comfortable with your own time. When you can build loyalty and trust, it is easier to enjoy each other when you are together or apart.

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Dating, Life,

Who Should Pay the Tab on the First Date?

A hotly contested subject with ChicagoCheapAss.com’s writers is: Who should pay the tab on the first date? The girl? The guy? And why? Take a look at both sides:

Rob Johnson, representing a Male’s Opinion:

The simple answer- its depends.

On what? It depends on how familiar you are with the person you are meeting. If you just met someone at the bar, going on a first date or in a relationship, there should be a different expectation to buy someone drinks, dinner or pay for a  night out.

If you are going out with the hopes of meeting someone, that is to date or hookup, I would not buy or accept drinks. Until you know that there is a genuine level of attraction between you and the other person, don’t invest too much of your money or energy.

Too many women use their looks or fake sense of interest in a man to their favor. This mindset to dating tarnishes the allure and spark of potentially meeting someone. Just like the man who assumes you own them something because he bought you drinks.

When you first begin going on dates with someone, it’s a good idea for the guy to pay. Its a simple act of flatly, that is not only respectful but shows that you have a vested interest in getting to know your date and build a sense of attraction.

Once you are going on dates regularly, it is fair to rotate who pays. I typically follow the rule of thumb, whoever initiated the outing, should pay.

Source: Wikipedia

Source: Wikipedia

Mallory LePage, representing a Woman’s Opinion:

Should men take the lead and pay for the first date to maintain a slight bit of traditional dating to allow women to practice being courted?  Here lies the debate of who picks up the tab for the first date. In a poll conducted in 2013 by LearnVest and T.D. Ameritrade, 55% of men said they thought the man should take the check while 63% of women expect the man to pay.  There is noticeable gap of inconsistency here.

From time to time, I find myself having similar conversations with both men and women.  Men often complain that they have to spend an enormous amount of money on numerous first dates whether it is dinner, drinks or both.  In these conversations with male friends and relatives I’ve found that they haven’t really put much thought into what women invest in for a first date.  In the defense of women, my dispute is the amount of money and time that we spend annually on products and services to maintain the way that we look in attempt to charm an attractive suitor.  Recently, I sat down to calculate the approximate amount of money I spend annually on hair upkeep (cut and color), hair products, hair appliances, makeup, face products, nails and that monthly visitor.

The results were staggering.  Annually, I spend roughly $5,000 on the bare minimum. This does not include products or services that men may also utilize including facials, massages, manicures/pedicures, clothing, jewelry, shoes, birth control, fragrance, gym memberships, body lotions, undergarments or lingerie.  I would consider myself to be in the median of this number.  There are women that spend much more than I do especially if you’re factoring in any form of Botox but also women that spend much less time and money.

A man paying on the first is not meant to undermine the strides we’ve taken for feminism and gender equality. As long as women are giving birth, there should always be some variation of obligatory practices that men should abide by including opening doors, allowing women on and off elevators first, arranging the evening, walking on the traffic side of the street and paying the bill on the first date.  Keep in mind; this is just the first date, beyond the first date or even first round of drinks it’s more than appropriate and acceptable for the woman to step in.

So who should pay the tab on the first date? Share your opinion in the comments!

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Events, Networking,

8 Must Attend Events at Techweek Chicago

This week marks the start of Techweek Chicago, a seven day smorgasbord of all things technology, entrepreneurship and innovation in Chicago. Featuring hundreds of speaks, events, workshops and networking opportunities, Techweek Chicago can be feel overwhelming to the first time visitor or even the seasoned patron. To help in your selection, the Chicago Cheap Ass staff selected its must attend events of the week.

Robots To The Rescue: The Evolution of Unmanned Vehicles

June 23 | 5:30 pm – 8:30 pm

Driverless cars, UAV and robotics have long been seen as the vision of the future, but the concept of unmanned vehicles is closer to reality than you may think. Today, this industry is poised for rapid growth in this area for a variety of tasks, including equipment and materials deliveries, aerial photography, and even life-saving support. Join BuildWorlds as they share their insights on the not so distant future of unmanned vehicles.

TechMixer with Industry Experts, Leaders & Entrepreneurs at ParadigmNEXT

June 24 | 6:30pm – 10:00pm

Join digital marketing and design firm, ParadignNEXT for an evening of cocktails, hors d’oeuvres and networking with industry experts, tech gurus and entrepreneurial professionals at the River North rooftop hotspot, Graffiti Lounge (Techweek Pass not required, open to the public).

State of Innovation in Chicago Tech

June 25 | 10:30 am – 12:00 pm

The growth of Chicago’s tech community did not happen by accident. City of Chicago Chief Information Officer Brenna Berman discusses the city’s comprehensive technology strategy to fuel modern infrastructure changes, create smart communities, and drive technological innovation.

Food Truck Face-Off

June 25 | 11:00 am – 4:00 pm

Salivate to your heart’s desire, this event will be as delicious as it sounds. The first ever Techweek Golden Burger will be bestowed upon the winner of the 2015 Food Truck Faceoff.

Lifestyle & Technology

June 25 | 3:00 pm – 5:45 pm

Innovation transients the business world. See how the growth of technology will affect the lives of ordinary people, most notably in the realm of fashion and dating. Hear from StyleSeek CEO, Tyler Spalding and Spark Starter COO, Benjamin Hohl.

Entrepreneurshift

June 26 | 10:30 am – 12:30 pm

Being an entrepreneur has been described as “jumping out of an airplane while attempting to build your parachute on the way down.”Featuring OkCupid founder, Sam Yagan and nationally acclaimed psychologist Jennifer Johnston-Jones, this 2 1⁄2 hour experiential summit will explore the necessary goals, habits and mindsets an entrepreneur can develop to channel their best self and maintain their sanity.

Innovative Tech

June 26 | 12:30 pm – 4:00 pm

This jam-packed session on innovation will titillate the mind. Discuss topics range from the rise of the Internet of Things, the shifting subscription economy and the constant fight for relevance within the online consumer experience.

Announcement of Finalists / Final Round Pitches

June 26 | 4:00 pm – 5:00 pm

The final round of Techweek Pitch is sure to showcase Chicago’s brightest and most innovative young companies as they compete for a chance to pitch their businesses at Techweek Nationals.